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The light hurts my eyes. There’s not much down here, but what little there is still stings of fresh ultraviolet. This area has some twisted girders sticking out of the concrete like a grove of trees writhing in pain. I see a pack of thugs sizing us up and open a gate to my bedroom. We enter my bedroom, and once all are inside, I banish the gate with a snap of my fingers. I’m an imperious lad.

“I’m hitting the bathroom and we can talk in the living room when I’m done.” I open the door telekinetically, and everyone else goes to the living room while I head to the bathroom. This shower is a blessing. Having access to my normal toilet facilities is wonderful as well.

After a quick shower, I get in the tub to soak. I need to decide what questions are important at this point. What kind of simulations are being run to save the world, and what are they saving the world from? How are people not going crazy living a zillion lifetimes as players? If I’m not a player, what is my lifespan? How does this shard work if it’s a game? Can I still play whatever game there is if I am not a player?

Why do you worry about whether you are a player or not?

I don’t have an answer for Tyu, who has otherwise been quiet since we left the sewer dungeon. I instead ask him if we need to keep him hidden.

Your friends are enormously powerful and have not been honest with you in your view. I recommend keeping something hidden from them. Whatever you feel would best serve you. You need to be sure you have an environment you feel safe in, so I recommend taking actions towards the security of your living arrangements. I also recommend maintaining socialization, so I do not necessarily recommend leaving this place.

I should study more about this place and my system windows.

I sit in silence and let my mind drift. I see the dead children I killed. I killed them. Were they real? They’re dead now. Am I real? I killed them. That was real. I experienced it. I realize Tyu hasn’t said anything. I feel remorse for what I’ve done, but I don’t think I want to kill myself over it. Maybe the orphanage idea isn’t a terrible one.

I open an equipment window and put a couple of gear sets into saved gear files, so I can dress myself instantly. I don’t want to wind up in another instance where I had no chance to put up a fight. I can even do independent weapon setups. This is some good flexibility. I move on from my equipment window

I open my status window. I haven’t checked it recently. I see a tab with notifications. It says ( 1 E 108,57…). I mess around with selecting things by search string and get rid of all my Multicasting skill ups. Well, I still have an arbitrarily large number, so I begin ridding myself of some other skill-up notifications. Dimensional magic, fecalmancy, gravity magic, telekinesis, all sorts of magic skill-up messages get trashed.

Before checking the messages that are left, I look at my skills that got enormous skill gains. My multicasting is now the main engine which powers all my spells. As long as I use multicasting, my spell casts are instant speed and get enormous bonuses to every parameter. My magic is just me changing reality at will with cantrips. The spells are some neat ways to do it, but I don’t feel like they are letting me do anything I couldn’t already do with endless cantrips.

If that’s the deal I could probably just use cantrips to bore a hole into another dimension and fight that shitty god right now. I imagine it happening, with my finger poking a hole into the god’s dimension. It isn’t until the water begins spilling through the hole into the other dimension that I realize I am not imagining it; it is happening right now. The portal opens wide, and I enter through it naked and dripping wet. I dress myself with a thought from my inventory using the saved gear files I just set up after dodging all the water rushing out of the tub through my portal.

The white space is painful to look at, as always. I think I can make some polarized sunglasses, yup, that is a lot better. This is a slick set of wrap-around sunglasses. I should wear these more. I see the shitty god forming. It looks like the geometric shapes are each sublimating out of air. That’s creepy in a way that makes me want to barf.

This god is an AI or something, right? Let’s see if I can use cantrips to make every option in its logic to be close and delete the program.

The god’s body ceases forming, dissolving into white smoke. A fanfare plays, and a window appears, indicating I have completed my character’s main quest, and may now move on to post-game content, set a second class, reincarnate, import alternate shard abilities using character points… Wow, the options keep going. This is an absurd amount of content that is now available. A tiny pile of ash remains where the god was. I loot it and find jewelry to gain additional experience for combat and a couple of small polyhedrons. Maybe dice? There’s also a note congratulating me on my speed-run record of the main quest, for using alternate means of progressing through the content, for beating it at level 1, for things I really couldn’t care to scroll through anymore.

I see a flashing window stating I can take the Soul of God. Well, that sounds like something useful, let’s get that. I get some new class options, I can do a ton of bullshit, I am still in this horrible white pocket dimension place, why is the system assaulting me with all of these new, unskippable messages? I exit through my portal, struggling only slightly to get all the way through it and out of the tub to close the portal, and exhale.

Well, I am certainly full of unexpected accomplishment. Then again, Rhynn said I was like a god. Maybe this isn’t that unexpected. I’m already dressed, I may as well go talk to them.

1 Comment

  1. zavyyn

    speedrunners btfo lmao


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